If my blog finds you because you’ve received a solar light as pictured below, I have prayed you would keep on reading.
I write to you from Sam’s nursery. You know it’s empty because you’ve visited his grave. Yesterday, when my husband and I noticed that the original lights had been stolen from Sam’s grave, I let you take something from me. It wasn’t just the $8.98 solar lights that Sam’s Grandma bought him from Lowe’s, but it was a small piece of my happiness.
You see, yesterday was the first day in five weeks that I had not cried. I had woken up and drank in the peace the day offered. I’m teaching myself mindfulness and yesterday was the first day I think I’ve really felt present in awhile.
When we visited our sweet one before dinner we noticed you had visited him, too. I hope you received a portion of what I do daily from his place of rest. Peace. The lights you took brought this Mama’s broken heart exactly that. It’s hard, I’m sure, to understand but when I lay my head down at night I had peace knowing Sam’s baby body wasn’t alone – in the dark.
In my brokenness and through my tears, I said some not so nice things about you on Facebook yesterday. Sam’s Grandma, who knows my heart, reminded me that we should pray for you. That you can’t really take Sam’s light from this world. So today when I visited, I did just that.
I asked God to be with you – just like He’s with me, and Sam. I asked Him to put it in your heart to return the original lights. I prayed that Sam’s light would illuminate your life in some way – just as it does for everyone who knows him – just as it will continue to do.
I’m confident at some point you’ll see the sign outside of Floyds Knobs Christian Church this week, in front of the cemetery. It reads “Share God’s love, not others hate.” May the same love that greets me, greet you.
You’re in my thoughts.
The Word gave life to everything that was created,
and his life brought light to everyone.
The light shines in the darkness,
and the darkness can never extinguish it.